Parable

As promised, I have written a parable. I have posted it. This is the parable of the Three Blind Hebrews.

There were actually five. As you may have guessed, their names were Azriel, Shmuel, Mordechai, Barak, and Yisrael. 

They lived in a morgue with other blind misfits. Like Rudolph. He wasn't blind, but we all remember that he was a misfit and his nose made noise. Then, one foggy Christmas Eve, Santa came to say Rudolph, with your nose so bright, won't you guide the sleigh tonight? The blind hebrews had known for some time that the golden eggs laid by the magical geese would cure their blindness. It was this that motivated them to seek the magical geese and find one that would be fit for laying golden eggs. 

Azriel was deceitfully promising to these geese. He would lure them in with his strong masculine hands and commit to always be there for them. To caress their feathers, make them herbal tea, and protect them from predators. This worked for him once in the past, as he was given many golden eggs by a sickly goose whom he cared for. He gobble those eggs up and could see as clearly as you or me. Actually, let's just say me, because I don't know how good your eyesight is. Anyways, as that goose grew stronger and healthier, Azriel's attachment also grew stronger. He was a great protector for this goose and this goose provided him many golden eggs so that he could see. They both profited immensely. But, with reason unbeknownst to anyone, this goose decided to flutter away. Although Azriel claims they agreed to depart. 

It was all for the better though, for Azriel found a much better goose practically the very next day. How many golden eggs will this goose provide? Hoof knows?

Incidentally, Shmuel also had a magical goose for quite some time but lost it. Alas. Therefore, he began the searching process. He searched here and there and one day came upon a very worthy bird. The question is, can he see now? No, he can't. I asked. Unless...

Along another vein, Mordechai, the funniest of them all. Did he have a goose to give him sight? Well, we had better hope not because if he knew how funny his face was... Anyways, no, he didn't have a goose. Did he want one? I dunno. There was a time he searched half-heartedly for a one. Prospects looked promising despite the little effort he expended, but it was for a brief moment because "Casual Mordechai," as they called him, found pleasure in blindness. It is a sad thing, too. He was extremely Hebrew. Maybe someday he will take a faithful leap and discover what he is missing. But that may be too late.

Now, we get to Barak. Easily the most lovable of all the blind Hebrews. All across the land he was known by both the white and the black as desirable. Every goose wished to be Barak's. They would waddle past his tent door morning, midday, and night. Sometimes even into the wee hours of the night you could hear them..Barak...Barak...Barak...the far off echo would say. Barak, being the wise, blind Hebrew he was, knew of the joy that would be had by coming into mutual agreement with one of these geese. But which one? He could secure any one he wanted. He just had to make the right choice.

Lastly, Yisrael. He was stronger, wiser, funnier, hungrier, and better than the other blind Hebrews. Also, he wasn't blind. Actually, he was. Or was he? wasn't he? was he? wasn't he?

So, now you know. Next time you see a Hebrew dude, you may want to throw something his way. If he lets it hit him squarely in the face, you may have just thrown something at a blind man. And if it's Casual Mordechai, he might throw a knife at you.